“Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies.” - Mother Teresa

Next month Mary Beth and I will celebrate our 23rd wedding anniversary. Our marriage has been redefined several times over the years. We are not the same couple now that we were 23 years ago and, just as significantly, we are not the same people.
My wife and I have matured and our marriage has matured. Time will do that. Life experience will do that, too. Because of what we have seen and experienced in our marriage, we are better prepared, and willing, to meet each other’s needs while at the same time preserving what is important to us, personally.
There have been plenty of high peaks in our marriage when loving each other was natural and easy. There have also been some deep valleys when we thought we just couldn’t get it together. We have discovered each day we do have the choice to commit to one another. Each day we have the choice to remain faithful to the marriage - faithful not just with sexual fidelity; although that is very important, but faithful in an emotional sense as well.
This list of 23 reasons I will always be faithful to Mary Beth comes from my heart to hers. I hope you find some value in these for your own relationship, too:
1. She is my best friend. I would rather hang out with her than any one else I know. Our Saturday’s of running errands or taking a few moments to talk over coffee at Starbucks, is some of the moments I cherish the most.
2. She shows me I’m worthy to be loved. I don’t feel like I’m second choice in her life.
3. She takes me out of my comfort zone. Mary Beth challenges me and she doesn’t let me take the easy, or safe way out of a situation. She reminds me that to keep growing as a person, I must continue to face my fears and insecurities.
4. She is a terrific mother and parent. My wife is very connected with each of our four children. They all feel loved by her and each one knows they can go to her for help or guidance without fear or shame getting in the way.
5. She gives me all the time I need to work on this blog. Never a pouty reaction – just unconditional support.
6. She takes care of those who are hurting the most. Mary Beth just finished her MSW degree at The University of Kansas. She is devoting the next phase of her professional career to helping those who are in emotional pain and have suffered significant trauma. She wants the rest of her patients’ lives to turn out a differently than how they started.
7. She is the “handy-man” around the house. If it wasn’t for the special skills of my wife, I would spend a fortune paying plumbers and electricians to fix the things I don’t have a clue to repair; but Mary Beth does.
8. She believes in me. No matter the circumstances or challenges, her belief in me never wavers. I can tell by looking into her eyes she truly believes I can do whatever I set-out to do.
9. She has a forgiving heart. My wife doesn’t carry a grudge or harbor resentment for long periods of time. Once she has accepted my apology for something I have done, and has chosen to forgive me – she means it and she lives it.
10. I still get excited when I get to see her for the first time of the day. During the week, I wake up very early and head to work before Mary Beth starts her day. Sometimes it can be as late as 9:00 p.m. before we see each for the first time. My stomach still tingles with excitement when I know I’m only a few minutes from seeing her.
11. She tells me she loves several times throughout the day. Every phone call during the day ends with “I love you,” and the last thing I hear at night as I prepare to fall to sleep is my wife loves me.
12. I respect her. Considering all she done for me, our family and the tremendous effort she places in making this world a better place for everybody else, I can’t imagine doing anything that would disrespect that commitment. I can’t imagine doing anything that would disrespect her.
13. She watches baseball games with me. And she enjoys it; and she knows the players’ names; and she gets excited when the Kansas City Royals win!
14. I miss her when we are apart for a few days. Time away from each other is healthy and beneficial; the homecoming is ever sweeter.
15. She doesn’t mind listening to sports-talk radio in the car. I never get the raised eyebrow look that says, “You expect me to listen to that?”
16. Sometimes she actually thinks I’m funny. She appreciates my sarcastic wit and my occasionally well-timed comebacks. No courtesy laughs here – she gets my sense of humor.
17. She still likes to hold hands when we take our after-dinner walks. Our evening walks have always been a great source of connection for us. We use this time to discuss our days and to help each other process or solve problems. Holding hands while we walk makes this time that much more special.
18. She is both unassuming and confident. Mary Beth seldom takes herself too seriously and at the same time she emits an incredible inner strength and self -confidence that people in her life are drawn to and find comfort in experiencing.
19. Her “I want to be with you” look still makes me weak in the knees.
20. She loves to cuddle. At the end of the day, when the day’s responsibilities are behind us, we grab a few moments to just be with each other as we chat and cuddle while watching something mindless on television. A few golden minutes to be sure.
21. She never quits on herself, or on us. I’m often taken back by her strong will (and sometimes just plain stubbornness) to never give up. No matter the obstacles, or the pain, or the circumstances, she has the ability to reach down and find something more to help keep her moving forward.
22. She looks beautiful in a camisole. They say love is blind, but my wife is beautiful in so many different ways. The camisoles she wears in summer don’t hurt either!
23. I can’t imagine life without her. A life worth living is a life worth sharing. Sharing my life with Mary Beth provides so many blessings. My heart will always remain faithful to hers because it is constantly being filled with her love and grace. I have faith it will always be this way – no matter what.
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“We should count each day as a separate life.” - Seneca
My friend Tim Brownson at A Daring Adventure recently published an article providing seven reasons to be cheerful in spite of your circumstances.
On the particular day Tim wrote this article, he was experiencing the ultimate bad mood creator – transitioning all of his computer files from his old Windows-based computer to his brand spanking new Macintosh computer. Even though Tim is a very bright and capable guy, this exercise proved to be, shall we say, challenging for him.
At the moment of his greatest frustration, he happened to hear his wife break out in what Tim describes as “raucous” laughter. He followed the sound and found his wife watching the movie Hitch with Will Smith.
Soon, Tim found himself smiling and laughing along with his wife. In just a few short moments, his bad day had turned around and corrected itself. To be honest though, it was really Tim who made the adjustment, not the day at all. My friend just found a very good reason to reframe his bad day and then look at it from a different point of view.
All of us have this same ability, too. There exists in each one us the energy needed to reverse the negative circumstances we face in our daily lives and make them either more positive or adjust them. We also have the choice to accept the negatives, but then choose not to allow them to have any power over us.
It is possible to have a good day, every day. It does take practice and it takes effort, but over time the actions that contribute to making each day a good day can become a habit.
The following 7 Ways to Boost Your Resistance to a Bad Day are not complicated. You don’t need a special degree or any advanced training. You just need a commitment to open your mind to a new way of thinking. When you do, your whole life has the potential to change. (more…)
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“Keep the lesson, but throw away the experience.” - Author Unknown

You may notice the headline for today’s post, How to Live Without Alcohol for 100 Days?, is in the form of a question; not a statement. The reason for this is because I don’t know the answer. But, I want to find out.
I have always experienced the gap, the thin line in my soul between alcoholism and sobriety as paper thin and always in danger of being erased. There is plenty of family history to suggest both a propensity and a genetic pre-disposition for alcoholism to surface inside me at any given time. It is a disease I have narrowly escaped most of my life – and I want to continue to do so.
My attempt to go 100 days without drinking a beer or having a glass of wine will not erase my tendencies to drink for the wrong reasons and it certainly will not give me any moral ground to stand on if I am indeed successful. I just want to see if I can do it. (more…)
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“When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I’m afraid.” – Audre Lorde

Welcome to the 38th issue of the Personal Development Carnival. This carnival is dedicated to people who want to share and receive ideas to improve the quality of their relationships, sustain happiness and create lasting success for the next 45 years; and beyond.
Every Sunday a new carnival containing your thoughts, articles and inspirational stories will be shared. You may participate by visiting the submission form at the bottom of this issue. Continue to live while resisting the temptation to regret your past. Instead, you need to take full advantage of your future. After all, it isn’t how you start in life, it’s how you finish. Here’s to finishing strong in life. (more…)
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by Jonathan Nasman

“Challenges are what make life interesting; overcoming them is what makes life meaningful.” - Joshua J. Marine
Overcoming setbacks is one of the most difficult things to do. It’s hard to remain positive and take action when all you can focus on are your shortcoming. We easily get caught up in thinking “what could I have done differently” or “things would be different if I would have only done ____.”
Unfortunately, we can’t take back the past. Focusing on what could have been or how things might be different will only continue our paralysis. Only by focusing on what we can do now, can we climb out of the hole we’ve dug.
Here are six things you can do now, to get out of your rut: (more…)
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“The unexamined life is not worth living.”- Socrates

April brings rain to the Midwest – a lot of rain and the possibility of severe weather, too. The cold air that once held a tight grip is now being usurped by the warmer, but more unstable air coming in from the south.
The clash of the two air masses creates an imbalance as well as instability in the atmosphere. At times the deafening noise from the thunder drowns out the sweet sounds of the replenishing rain.
Startled by the booming reverberation of the thunder, our attention is momentarily diverted. After the last echo of thunder rumbles out of ear-shot, we can return to listening to the rain and, if we choose, we can feel it heal the earth after a particularly harsh winter.
It’s like this in our personal lives, too. We can be startled by what we keep down deep inside of us. We become surprised by its noise when it demands our attention. We are shocked by its force and energy. We may forget the goodness that continues to exist in each one of us when we are reminded to deal with the unpleasant and uncomfortable parts of our souls, too. (more…)
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“When I dare to be powerful, to use my strength in the service of my vision, then it becomes less and less important whether I’m afraid.” – Audre Lorde

Welcome to the 37th issue of the Personal Development Carnival. This carnival is dedicated to people who want to share and receive ideas to improve the quality of their relationships, sustain happiness and create lasting success for the next 45 years; and beyond.
Every Sunday a new carnival containing your thoughts, articles and inspirational stories will be shared. You may participate by visiting the submission form at the bottom of this issue. Continue to live while resisting the temptation to regret your past. Instead, you need to take full advantage of your future. After all, it isn’t how you start in life, it’s how you finish. Here’s to finishing strong in life. (more…)
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“In life you need either inspiration or desperation.” - Tony Robbins

Take control of your life and make a difference for yourself and others – this is the central theme and message of Dave Pelzer’s new book Moving Forward: Taking the Lead in Your Life. The book challenges us to let go of the past and move forward to greatness.
For Pelzer, moving forward is not just a personal issue. It’s also about setting an example and giving back. It’s about being a true leader and mentor; someone who gets things done without fanfare, bells or whistles. (more…)
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“The question is not whether we will die, but how we will live.” - Joan Borysenko

In the book The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die, author John Izzo interviewed over 200 individuals in order to discover the stories of these people and to learn the secrets of life.
The people interviewed ranged in age from 59 – 105, each of whom were identified by friends and acquaintances as “the one person they knew who had found happiness and meaning.”
I often return to the book to re-read their stories and to continue learning how to take their advice to heart. The following sentences from these interviews resonate with me the most because they are complete with the kind of philosophy, inspiration and wisdom that is both practical and undeniable.
These nuggets of truth are both comforting and helpful when Life gives you a surprise pop-quiz and you find yourself looking for some answers:
Find your passion and pursue it. - Lea Williams, author and educator, 58 (more…)
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“Doubt can only be removed by action.” - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

To create the success you are seeking takes effort and it takes action. What keeps many of us from realizing the lasting success we desire is in not understanding what actions to take; so we don’t take any action. We stay stuck. And we stay unfulfilled and unhappy.
It is important for me to create lasting success in the different areas of my life. I want to take what I have learned and align it with my desire to continue learning. I have recently developed a game plan – an action plan, I can use each week. This action plan will provide the necessary guidance to help keep me on track and to keep me motivated. You are welcome to use this, too.
This weekly action plan offers very tangible and specific ideas, thoughts and strategies. It’s a tool, of sorts, to take the actions needed to accomplish the goals you have set in your personal relationships, as a parent, and to obtain the spiritual, career and financial success you may be searching for right now.
The plan is simple. Write these actions in a journal and then record your progress throughout the week. To change, you must take action. Action begins with making a plan. Consider these 24 weekly actions for creating lasting success, happiness and balance. (more…)
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