Four Rocks to Grasp in Life

“They paved paradise and put up a parking lot. With a pink hotel, a boutique, and a swinging hot spot. Don’t it always seem to go. That you don’t know what you got until it’s gone.” - Joni Mitchell

The coffee shop a few blocks from my house recently closed. On nights when I wanted to have a couple of hours to get some writing done, I would pack-up my laptop and head to this inspirational sanctuary. It never really occurred to me I would arrive one night and find it closed.

Likewise, it’s unsettling when, for as long as we can remember, we drive past the old farm house sitting on land covered with loblolly pines and oak tress only to look over one day from the car window and see it gone. Where a graceful, almost majestic home once stood has now been interrupted by earth movers and dump trucks. Our paradise has been deferred and we are uncertain of its new location.

Moments like these sting. It can feel like getting slapped in the face when you are not expecting it. The reality of knowing what we have today can be gone tomorrow can feel very harsh and uncomfortable.

Most of us like routine; we like the certainty and comfort of doing the same things each day and with the same people. This gives us a secure foundation for the times when we find the inspiration to try something new.

Living a full life takes a measure of risk and it does take courage. Sometimes having a rock to grasp when we make the decision to walk out of our comfort zones gives us the firm footing we need to go forward.

We hope the rocks will be readily available when we encounter turbulence along the way. Rocks are placed all around us. We just need to remember to look for them.

The Rock of Passion

Living a life of passion is living a life of meaning. Passion allows you to follow your heart’s desire without needing the approval or consent of others. Your passion is your centering agent and your soul’s compass. It will tell you when you are veering off course and it will tell you when the path you about to go down doesn’t help get you closer to your life’s purpose.

The passion rock helps you celebrate your uniqueness and value. When your self confidence is eroding and the thought of giving up is becoming the more likely choice, grasp the rock of passion and it will keep other people or difficult circumstances from sweeping you away.

Just like you have a genetic strand of DNA that determines the color of your eyes, you also have been given a divine strand of DNA that has predisposed you for a specific life purpose. Your passion will not betray you from living this purpose. This is the rock.

The Rock of Forgiveness

What happened in the past must stay in the past. It doesn’t define your value then, or now. The rock of forgiveness gives you freedom and helps you find the courage to live in the here and now.

To be clear, forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself; not to the person requesting forgiveness. Forgiving, and letting go of the anger, frees your soul to be able to look ahead and to dream of the things yet to come in your life.

If self-forgiveness is needed, it works the same way. Let it go, whatever it is, and move forward. Learn from the past, but don’t stay there. Allow forgiveness to be a rock in your life and you will find mercy leads to clarity, and clarity leads to inspirational living.

The Rock of Surrender

Sometimes when we want something so much we find it difficult to focus on anything else. We try; we work; we try some more; we work even harder and still nothing.

Frustration and doubt seep in and we begin to loose our patience and faith. We begin to listen to other people and doubt our now motives, or even our sanity. However, if the thing you are working so hard to achieve is aligned with your life’s purpose and is the basis for your passion, then it’s not a matter of if, only when it will be delivered to you.

During these difficult times is when you can fall back to the rock of surrender. This rock may feel like the hardest to find because true surrendering can be one of the more difficult things to do.

Think of surrendering like asking for help. You are summoning up all of your courage and faith and turning it all over to something that exists beyond you. You must then trust the divine DNA that has been placed inside of you, and wait.

My son, Andrew, came home from baseball practice tonight feeling discouraged. Even though he made the varsity team as a sophomore, he believes the coach is being too hard on him and not giving him a fair chance to be the team’s shortstop, the position my son has played his entire life.

Andrew said the coach told him to bring his outfielder’s glove to practice tomorrow. My son doesn’t have this kind of glove and didn’t know what to do. The next steps were clear.

First, after giving him my credit card to buy one, I told him he needed to surrender what was happening with the coach and just go do what he loves – play baseball. This is Andrew’s passion.

On his sixteenth birthday, Mary Beth and I allowed him to get a tattoo on his back. The tattoo is a cross with the words passion, heart and sacrifice inscribed on it. I clearly remember the evening last September when Andrew and I were heading to the tattoo parlor for his appointment. We discussed the significance and the responsibility of wearing these words on his body for the rest of his life.

Andrew and I talked about the fact there may be some days when he doesn’t feel very passionate, or doesn’t have the heart to keep going or may feel he is no longer willing to make the sacrifices necessary to accomplish his goals. And that’s OK.

On days when he is not living, or feeling, these words, all he has to do is to look at the words and understand each is a choice. On these days he can surrender to his doubt, ask for help and wait for the storm to pass.

When Andrew returned home with the new glove, his spirits had improved. I reminded him he cannot change or control how his coach thinks of him, nor can he control the position he plays or even how much he will play. But Andrew is empowered to make the choice to surrender all of this and just focus on his passion. By doing so, everything will work out naturally and according to the DNA that is already inside of him.

The Rock of Hope

The largest rock, with perfectly- sized notches on all sides just right for human hands, is hope.

Hope is what we see when the lights are tuned off in our coffee shops when we expect them to be on and inviting us to come inside for a little comfort. We see hope in the broken earth that once supported an old farm house full beauty and grace.

We begin to see hope in ourselves when we find the will to live our passion and the mercy to forgive those who may have kept us from it in the past. We feel our lives becoming a part of something larger when we surrender and ask for a little help – for a little more hope. The sting of unwanted change that burns our face with its harsh reality is soothed and kissed by hope.

We reach down to find our rock. We grasp it tightly at first. When the burning stops we let go. We are ready to move on, again.

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