Five Healing Lessons Learned from Pain

“In my world, nothing ever goes wrong.” –Nisargadatta Maharaj

Editor’s Note: The following is a guest post from Patricia Singleton, author of the blog Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker.

“In my world, nothing ever goes wrong.”

Wayne Dyer, author of Your Sacred Self, introduced me to this expression by Nisargadatta Maharaj. Your Sacred Self is my favorite of the Wayne Dyer series of books.

This book made such a tremendous impact on my spiritual journey that I have given it as gifts to several of my friends. Do you have any sayings such as this or any books that you have read that have impacted your life as this one has mine?

You will find these words, “In my world, nothing ever goes wrong” scattered throughout my house and written on poster paper and index cards. The use of this expression can enable you to look at the challenges in your life as lessons you need to learn, rather than as things going wrong.

You will find a simple shift of your attitude can make big changes in how you see people and situations. A major shift happened for me when I started looking at the sexual abused committed against me in this way.

Rather than continue to blame others which only keeps you stuck in the pain of the abuse if you look at the whole incident as a series of lessons, you will be able to release the pain and leave it in the past with the abuse. You may ask, “What lessons can be learned from being sexually abused as a child?”

Here are five healing lessons learned from pain:

1. You can become a survivor rather than a victim—just a small shift in perception that makes a big difference in how you see yourself. You can go from feeling helpless as a victim to being a powerful voice against abuse. You can begin to see the value that you have as a human being.

2. You are courageous rather than being fearful of all people—again, just a small shift that can allow you to trust and love again. Trust can be a really big issue for a survivor of any kind of abuse. I had to learn to trust women. I was afraid of being judged harshly by women because the major women in my childhood were judgmental. When I was seven years old, my aunt told me that I was going to Hell because I was wearing shorts. I have been blessed that certain women came into my life as an adult that taught me that it was OK to trust. I now know that no child is going to Hell just because of what they are wearing.

3. You may find that you have developed strengths of character that you might not have otherwise possessed without going through the abuse and the process of healing the abuse. You don’t learn courage if you have never been afraid. You don’t know compassion unless you have been hurt. You don’t know strength unless you have been tested. You don’t know victory unless you have faced adversity. You can’t love until you have learned to love yourself.

4. You may find, as I did, that you have a faith in God and in yourself that grows stronger each day because you stopped blaming God and yourself for the abuse. For years, I was angry at God and hated myself. I didn’t share who I really was with anyone because I was afraid that you would see how bad, how tainted, I was. None of that is true today. You might find, as I did, that you can love yourself and that your love connects you with and comes from the God within you. God, then, is no longer some entity outside of you. We are One.

5. I choose to see the sexual abuse as a blessing instead of a curse. This is a huge shift for me that would not have happened without the first four smaller shifts of perception. You can, in the same way, turn your smaller shifts of perception into a huge shift that will affect your entire being.

All of these and so many more shifts can happen for you if you decide to apply these same words, “In my world, nothing ever goes wrong,” to your own life.

Lessons are good. They teach you about yourself. How you react to the challenges in your life gives you valuable lessons about yourself if you will take the time to look. Become willing to see and changes will come. You can’t stop them.

Today I love my world (even on the days that I feel sad or angry) and I love me. You might ask, “How can you love your world on the days that you feel sad or angry?”

On those days, I know that I am present just because I do feel those things. You don’t have to get stuck in the feelings. You can look to see what it is that you need to see or hear or learn to make a difference in your life. This process will work for you if you are willing to face yourself.

I want to thank Alex for asking me to do this guest post. I have learned and grown from the experience. Alex, thanks for adding to and becoming a part of my spiritual journey.

Patricia Singleton
Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker

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