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45 Tips for a Happier, Simpler and More Productive Life

Posted on: Tuesday, February 26th, 2008 Categories: Create Lasting Success, Improve Relationships, Sustain Happiness

To avoid criticism do nothing, say nothing, be nothing.” – Elbert Hubbard

45 Tips for a Happier, Simpler and More Productive Life

Every now and then we need a nudge, a little extra help. Life can be challenging and sometimes it can test our resolve, determination and faith. When Life surprises us with a pop-quiz, it’s good to know where we can find some of the answers.

The following 45 tips are by no means a comprehensive list, but rather a cheat-sheet of sorts to keep some of the most basic answers in front of us. Let’s hear some of your tips in the comments below.

1. Notice what’s right in your life
Some see the glass as being half-full while others see the glass as half-empty. This expression goes straight to the heart of the power of positive thinking and taking the time to notice what’s working – and then doing more of it!

2. Be grateful
How many times do you say the words “thank you,” in a day? How many times do you hear these same words? If you are doing the first thing, saying “thank you”, the latter will naturally happen.

3. Remember the kid you were
As adults, we sometimes forget how to play, how to relax, or just how to be a kid again. We succumb to expectations we think are imposed on us. This keeps us from feeling the joy and happiness of just cutting loose and playing.

4. Be kind
There is no question by merely watching acts of kindness creates a significant elevation in our moods and increases the desire for us to perform good deeds as well. Kindness is indeed contagious and when we make a commitment to be kind to ourselves and to others we can experience new heights of joy, happiness and enthusiasm for our lives.

5. Spend time with your friends
Although an abundant social and romantic life does not itself guarantee happiness, it does have a huge impact on our happiness. Learn to make the friendships a priority in your life.

6. Savor every moment
To be in the moment is to live in the moment. Too often we are thinking ahead or looking ahead to the next event or circumstance in our lives, not appreciating the “here and now.” When we savor every moment, we are savoring the happiness in our lives.

7. Rest
Take the time to unwind, decompress, or to put it simply, just “to chill.” Life comes at us hard and fast. Fatigue, stress and exhaustion may begin to settle in on us faster than we may think, or notice. The best remedy for this is rest.

8. Put on a happy face
Sometimes we have to fake it until we make it. I’m not suggesting we not be honest, real or authentic, but I’m suggesting, sometimes, we just need to put on a happy face and keep moving forward. Researchers claim that smiling and looking like we are happy will make us happier. Studies further show if we act like we are happy then we can experience greater joy and happiness in our lives.

9. Move!
The expression a “runner’s high” does not infer an addiction, but a feeling or a state of mind - a state of euphoria. There is no question exercise, or any physical exertion, elevates your mood and enhances a more positive attitude as well as fosters better personal self-esteem and confidence.

10. Pursue your goals
The absence of goals in our lives, or more specifically avoiding to pursue our goals, makes us feel like we are stuck and ineffective. The pursuit of goals in our personal lives, with our relationships, or at work, with our careers, is the difference between a mediocre life or a life full of passion and enthusiasm.

11. Find your calling
Some find meaning in religion or spirituality while others find purpose in their work or relationships. Finding your calling may be much more than accomplishing one simple strategy for increasing your happiness, but having a sense of purpose – of feeling like you are here for a reason – can perhaps bring the greatest happiness of all.

12. Get into the flow
Flow is the form of joy, excitement and happiness that occurs when we are so absorbed in an activity we love that we can loose ourselves and time seems to stand still. What creates flow is unique to each one of us.

13. Play to your strengths
One way to achieve flow is by understanding and identifying our strengths and core values, and then begin to use these every day. Once we aware of our strengths and we begin to play to our strengths, we can better incorporate them in all aspects of our lives.

14. Don’t overdo it
Know when to say when. What gives you joy and happiness the first time may not work the second time. Too much of a good thing may begin not to feel as good if the “thing” becomes more of a routine, or an expectation. Set healthy and reasonable boundaries for yourself and don’t overdo it.

15. Forget regret
Leave your mistakes and regret in the past. They don’t define your value, then or now. When you stay in the past you become stuck and unable to move forward. We all have made mistakes with our job choices, friends and relationships. The consequences can hit us pretty hard. However, to begin learning how to put these experiences behind us – by letting them go, we can begin to live in the here and now.

16. Learn from failure
Learning from failure and having regret are two separate things. Regret is an emotion; a feeling of disappointment along with a modest amount of shame or guilt. But to look back at a circumstance and figure out what went wrong gives you some very important information.

17. Ask for help
You are not alone. It may feel that way sometimes, but there are many people who would extend their hand and lift you up if asked. All you have to do is ask. Often times we are afraid to ask because we don’t believe we are worthy to receive the help. Think about this: we are surrounded by millions and millions of people by design - for a purpose.

18. Believe you are worthy
Whatever your goal, your dream, or your desire, you are worthy of achieving it. The closer you get to it is when the enemy of you soul will begin putting doubt in your mind. Replace doubt with the truth – you are worthy to have your heart’s true desire.

19. Take 100% responsibility
Except in rare and unfortunate circumstances, you are responsible for the quality and condition of your life. Your career, your relationships and your happiness are all under your direct control. Avoid finger-pointing and embrace the control you have in your life.

20. Know what you want
Understanding what and where you want to go in life will provide you with a vision and an insatiable spirit for the journey. Here’s a simple way to figure out what you want: Take a sheet a paper and write down all of the things you want in life. The one that jumps off the page and causes you to cry is what you want most. Honor this one and nurture it. And if you allow, it will take you to where you go.

21. Trust what happens
There are no accidents without value. When you get hit hard and land on your back, look for the reasons and for the value in this. Open your heart and trust this happened for a reason.

22. Keep the faith
At the end of the day when you are weary from all of the effort and energy you have expended and you are sore and tired from being hit hard so many times, but the dream is not realized, the one thing that tells you to keep going; to get up tomorrow and to keep moving forward, is your faith.

23. Get in touch with your life
Get in touch with the areas in your life you would like to change and have more success. Don’t try to boil the ocean in a short period of time. Rather, consider three “quick wins” in the next several months that will help you with creating new habits and will build the foundation to support longer term success.

24. Make a list
Write down the three things you want to do differently in the next few months, things you are not doing now, but would like to begin to do that will give you a greater sense of success, accomplishment and purpose in your life.

25. Perform new actions
Performing new actions will lead to creating new habits. Be aware of the habits you want to learn to change. Also be aware that the bad habits may interfere with your progress. Acknowledge these bad habits and don’t give them the power to keep you from moving forward.

26. Share
There seems to be a higher sense of accountability when things are shared. Tell your partner or best friend what you want accomplish and by when. Sharing also gives you a safer venue to discuss your fears and concerns.

27. Communicate in your marriage or relationship
Good marriages and relationships depend on expressing your thoughts and emotions to each other, of speaking and being heard. If not, everything else will live on shaky ground. In order to have a successful relationship you have to make yourself an expert in communicating with your partner.

28. Learn to resolve conflicts in your marriage or relationship
If your partner simply wants something different from you or does something differently from you, it doesn’t mean that your partner is wrong – it just means your spouse has different preferences, life experiences and point of view. Celebrate these differences. Chances are very good it is these very differences that made you fall in love with this person in the first place.

29. Maintain a commitment to your marriage or relationship
This can be especially difficult today with all of the distractions of our daily lives, but it’s important that you put your relationship first. If you’re committed to making it a success, and you know that your partner shares your commitment, there’s nothing the two of you can’t accomplish.

30. Get healthy
We spend hundreds and thousands of dollars a year on things that make us sick and lead to all sorts of other costs. So kick that smoking habit, go out drinking two nights a week instead of four, or ride your bike to work.

31. Smarter Saving and Spending: Buy Homegrown
Local craftsmen, farmers, and retailers offer unique items at prices that don’t include shipping and handling charges, which have increased exponentially of late due to the sky-rocketing cost of fuel.

32. Smarter Saving and Spending: Buy Used
Used clothes can be passed off as vintage, so why the stigma on other previously owned items? Most used items are perfectly functional and many have developed an endearing and priceless layer of character.

33. Smarter Saving and Spending: Don’t Buy Extended Warranties
If you’re buying that new laptop or plasma television, use your major credit card and it will likely lengthen the warranty just as far as the plan that will cost you hundreds of extra dollars at.

34. Stop doing what’s not working in your life
Comfort can be your biggest obstacle to growth and happiness. Take an honest look at your own life. Are you doing things you know don’t work; but you keep doing them nonetheless because either you are too scared to try something new or you don’t know any other way?

35. Try on things you’ve never done before to see if they work
In order to find the success and happiness you are looking for in life, you must be willing to take risks. Perhaps the most challenging oxymoron in life is in order to build self-confidence, you must first take risks.

36. Exercise to help you discover your source of strength
Exercise is indeed a good venue to discover your source of strength and character. It builds confidence and instills a spirit that better connects your mind to your body. It helps you appreciate the value of goal setting and ultimately goal attainment. It creates better life balance. Simply put, exercise helps you feel better about yourself.

37. Listen to your body
There is a direct connection between our physical and mental health. When we are fatigued our thinking is not as sharp and our confidence wanes. But when we are rested and full of energy, our actions are more deliberate and our results are more significant. Listen to your body – it will tell you what you need.

38. Slow down and do nothing
Take about 15 minutes each day and grab a cup of coffee or tea and give yourself time to think about whatever it is you want to think about. You will be surprised at the inspiration that will come to you.

39. Complete one item off your “to do” list each day
Return the overdue telephone call, clean-up your email inbox, or get an oil change for you car. By accomplishing just one thing that has been gnawing at you, will give you a much-needed sense of relief and accomplishment.

40. Perform one act of random kindness daily
Hold the elevator door open for someone who is a few steps behind you or lift the bag and place it in the overhead bind on the airplane for someone who can’t manage this task. Kindness breeds more kindness. The concept of “paying it forward” is real and effective.

41. Review your goals
If you have not put your goals in writing, do this today. There is a direct and proven correlation between people who have written, stated goals and their level of accomplishment compared to people who do not.

42. Listen, really listen, when someone is speaking to you
Listen without judgments or criticism. Try to avoid any self-referencing and be fully present for whoever needs it.

43. Say “I Love You”
Tell the people who you truly love and cherish this every day. Do so with heart-felt sincerity. Love them as if this were their, and your, last day on earth. Don’t wait; tell them today because there is no day but today.

44. Practice forgiveness
The purpose of giving forgiveness is not to let the other person off the hook, but to free you of the baggage associated with the event. When you refuse to forgive, you remain stuck in that place. With forgiveness you can begin the process of moving forward with your life.

45. Give yourself grace and mercy
We all make mistakes – always have and always will. Perhaps no one is harder on you, than you. Give yourself grace for your sins and mistakes. These don’t define your value or purpose in life. Focus on what you can today, right now, to begin feeling more comfortable in your own skin. You are worthy to receive the good fortunes of life and you are more than enough.

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28 Responses to “45 Tips for a Happier, Simpler and More Productive Life”

  1. Lorraine Cohen Says:

    Wow - what a great list Alex

    Great reminders that being happier can be experienced by making small changes that can have big results.

    K.I.S.S - Keep it simple stupid (I like baby rather than stupid :D)

    Cheers,
    Lorraine

    http://www.powerfull-living.biz

  2. Mark McCullagh Says:

    Pretty comprehensive list. All good stuff.

    I would add “Love God.”

    In a non-sectarian, whatever that means to you, way.

  3. etavitom Says:

    What an amazing list!! Thank you so much for the great tips….

  4. Alex Blackwell Says:

    Lorraine, I agree with K.I.S.S. - it has always worked for me!

    Mark - thanks for your addition.

    Etavitom - thank you for stopping by!

  5. Jonathan Mead Says:

    Great list! Thanks for all the tips.. one that I might add that’s helped me is writing a list of my values and meditating on them each morning. It helps me stay focused.

    http://jonathanmead.com - Authenticity, Clarity, Balance

  6. Darlene Norris Says:

    Exercise is the one thing I tend to forget about, and it’s so important! My hubby and me went out for a walk in the woods yesterday so he could try out our new digital camera. We only stayed out about a half-hour or so, but we both had a blast, and felt so much better when we came back!

    Thanks for a good list.

  7. metroknow - AlmostFit.com Says:

    Excellent list!

    Number 8 reminded me of something I discovered by accident years ago. If I am feeling stressed, I tend to hunch over more for some reason, as if I’m “leaning into” the problem, or being physically weighed down by it.

    I found that if I’m aware of my posture, and that I sit and stand up straight as if I own my space, I actually feel physically and emotionally a little better. For whatever reason, it works!

    Thanks for the hard work on this list - job well done.

    Metroknow
    http://www.almostfit.com

  8. Alex Blackwell Says:

    Great suggestion to be aware of our posture - thanks for adding this.

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  14. Dean Says:

    Hi Alex,

    I’m really fond of camping. Simple, easy and down to basics: food and water, shelter and relationships with other campers or nature.

    Ahhh, the great outdoors.

  15. Roger Carr Says:

    Alex,

    This is a great list. I especially like you the fact you added “finding your calling” and “perform one act of random kindness daily.”

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  18. Andrew Says:

    What a fantastic list! Now all I have to do is do them!

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  25. benny Says:

    I like the list! From my perspective, they all are specific adaptations of my own philosophy… but hey, it’s nice to see them! My favorite is #45… at least in my own life, that was the hardest for me to really apply, but when I’ve done it right it’s been glorious, you know?

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  27. Bob & Brad Says:

    Thank you very much for share your tips. I wanted to add my thoughts on the subject. I hope you enjoy them as I enjoyed yours!

    How many times do we ask ourselves what we are doing here on earth? What is this ride really supposed to be about, and what is my part in this huge cosmic scheme? When you awaken in the morning and start the new day, do you feel direction in your life along with a sense of purpose and meaning? As you retire at night do you feel you have contributed something of value that makes you feel good about what you put into the mainstream of life today?

    These questions, however we ask them are an inescapable part of our existence and journey throughout this life time. So many people walk through their life unconscious, disconnected, numbed out and clueless, in regard to what their purpose is for being here. When I, Bob, was in college, I had an opportunity to do community based work in a little school house for Special Needs kids as a way of earning college credit. It was in the 60s, during the time of “Tune in, Turn on, and Drop Out” and with no shortage of “Altered State” experiences; the opportunity to work with these kids was the highlight of my college years.

    I felt so gratified in the sharing of myself with those in need. And the receptivity and appreciation that I experienced from these kids was without parallel. I knew, without knowing, that I had found my Passion and Purpose. It took many years to let go of self defeating behaviors and attitudes in order to recognize that being in service to others was my “calling”. There is no doubt in my mind that I was tapping into my authenticity when in service to these kids.
    When you look at the work you do and the roles you play as parent, partner, community member, son/daughter, etc. it is quickly evident that there is some form of service embedded in all of these different roles. We are inherently wired to give and to serve. Whatever these roles in service are for each of us, there is pretty much, no escaping it. Hence, if we live from a getting paradigm we really miss the boat as to what our Passion and Purpose is.

    There are obstacles, pitfalls, self defeating behaviors and beliefs that inhibit your capacity to fulfill your Passion and Purpose. They each have elements of fear which creates separation from our own authenticity.

    The first obstacle we want to share with you is the “Pleasing Others” Syndrome (also referred to as Co-Dependence). If in your work/service experience there is a predisposition to look for approval, to be constantly worrying about pleasing others, this focus gets in the way of the joy and gratification that accompanies the work you are doing. It creates a burden and heaviness when the primary motive is about seeking validation. Embedded in this dynamic is a tremendous amount of fear and insecurity.

    This fear can grip you in a way that creates more and more anxiety about performance and approval ratings, and thus robs you of the dopamine response (natural opiates in the brain) that is released when we are giving from a place of authenticity. It is not so much how you are in service to others as it is where you are coming from attitudinally. The more you unleash and dig out your fears, the more you will gravitate towards the Passion and Purpose that is waiting to reveal itself within you.

    When we speak of fears it is in reference to the self deception, the limitations and the erroneous belief systems that inhibit going for your Greatness. Needless to say, there are healthy fears that keep you safe and protected. These fears are wired into our brains so that we don’t put ourselves in harms way. The trick is being able to distinguish when it is truly our healthy fear responses being activated vs. a distorted belief that you need constant approval or validation for you to matter.

    The second obstacle to living from a place of Passion and Purpose is the attitude and accompanying behaviors that say you must be the “Superstar”. Again, fear is going to be dwelling at the core of this ideology you live from. When you work from a place of Kindness, Compassion and Empathy, these forms of vulnerability become very empowering.

    To operate from arrogance (I do no wrong) leaves you without humility, which is a fundamental part of fulfilling Passion and Purpose. We have to be willing and able to forgive our mistakes and allow for error, as long as we are honestly working towards the greater good of those we serve. When you can honestly say that you have given of yourself for fun and for free, without the need of reward or recognition, then you are living in a state of Passion and Purpose.

    The third pitfall that stands in the way of living from an authentic place of Passion and Purpose is leaving your spirit out of the process. Passion and Purpose bring with it a creative energy that feels fulfilling. You can feel tired at the end of the day as a result of the work you have done, but to equal measure there is energy that you experience as a result of the creative process.

    In the corporate world, individuals have been taught to leave their soul out of the equation. If we don’t bring our soul to work, then climbing the corporate ladder or creating business “success” is an empty experience that leaves you pushing, pushing and pushing looking for that elusive thing we call happiness and fulfillment. Bringing our spirit and soul to work is the happiness and fulfillment.

    The fourth obstacle that stands in the way of fulfilling Passion and Purpose is perfectionism. The perfectionist has unrealistic expectations of themselves and others. If you are invested in always being right, in making others wrong, this will greatly inhibit your pursuit of happiness and create a barrier in the fulfilling of your Passion and Purpose.

    We can all strive for excellence without the need to dominate, control and be critical of ourselves and others. Once again, the lack of compassion, kindness and empathy, dwells at the center of perfectionism. And embedded at the core, is fear. When you live from a critical and controlling place the unauthentic response to being challenged will create defensiveness. As a result, there will be disconnection and alienation, even if you’re right.

    All of the above obstacles and pitfalls are centered in fear. Out of the fear a belief system of selfishness and self centeredness is designed. These pitfalls are so embedded into our work culture that they are seen as normal. Fortunately, more and more of us are awakening to the need for change and finding ways to be fulfilled and happy in service to others.

    Natural law will always work on our behalf when we are fulfilling our Passion and Purpose. As you follow your calling, people, resources and support systems will just show up. You are no different than a lighthouse with its beacon showing the way home to the ships at sea. The life force within each of us is the core of our authenticity and hence, our creativity. When connected to this deep place within we will circumvent fear and attract all of the good we could ever imagine.

    Below are a few questions to ask yourself in your pursuit of Passion and Purpose.

    1. What excites you in a way that you would want to participate in daily?

    2. When you are doing this exciting thing, does time and space temporarily cease to exist?

    3. Do you feel challenged at a physical, emotional and spiritual level?

    4. Is there a sense of accomplishment, fulfillment and achievement that manifests from these challenges?

    5. When participating in what excites you, do you have a clear sense that this is what you want to be doing?

    6. Do you enjoy this work so much that you would do it for free?

    7. Do you get excited when you talk to others about what you do?

    If you can answer yes to all of these questions you are certainly living from a place of Passion and Purpose. If you find you just wake up to go to your job without the accompanying passion, creativity and excitement, give yourself permission to get support. You deserve to feel fulfilled in this lifetime, and to be able to look back and feel you’ve made a difference for the better of mankind and/or the planet.

    Enjoy,

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