Couples who have a very good relationship are not just lucky. Successful, loving relationships do not just happen. 
The couples who have loving relationships are taking specific actions that people in unsuccessful relationships are not taking.
Good relationships take work, effort and patience. Good relationships don’t just happen; they happen because there is a commitment and a plan. Over the next several days the following five specific actions will be highlighted and are intended to help you and your partner make a plan for your relationship:
Action 1: Kindness to self and other
Action 2: Take personal responsibly for your feelings and needs
Action 3: Organizational responsibility
Action 4: Financial responsibility
Action 5: Health and well-being
Action 1: Kindness to self and other
People in successful relationships treat themselves and their partner with kindness – kind words, kind actions, kind looks, kind listening, and kind thoughts. It is far more important to them to be kind than to try to control their partner with anger, judgment, criticism, irritation, blame, resistance or withdrawal. An important piece of my reconciliation with my wife, Mary Beth, was to replace criticism with kindness and support. This single action is perhaps the primary reason we were able to avoid divorce.
One way to show kindness to your partner is to express appreciation at least once a day. At the end of the day, tell your partner three things you appreciate - either something your partner is doing now or something more permanent. One example is, “I really appreciate your support and belief in me today.” But so is “You have always had a beautiful smile.”
Begin to shift away from any “victim thinking” and replace it with an “attitude of gratitude.” If your partner is annoying you, you have three choices: (1) change it; (2) leave it; or (3) embrace it. If you choose to neither change nor leave, then you are responsible for your choice. Therefore, own your choice and begin to appreciate the positive qualities in the situation and do not harbor resentment. Exchange resentment for kindness and watch your relationship become healthier and more intimate.
Next: Take personal responsibility for your feelings and needs.
Relationship Improvement - Learn How to Repair a Relationship using The Sedona Method